Great post Ken. If only the judging and justifying could stop, we'd all have more energy for the things that matter. Here's for all the open-hearted people out there ❤️
Thanks Cole. I don’t mind an open discussion and if that person had approached me at the event, we could have talked and found common ground or at least some healthy debate. But alas, this was not the way they went. It’s difficult - for me at least - to express ‘rawthenticity’ without feeling like I am ‘making a fuss’, but I guess sometimes you have to put stuff out there.
Love this, Ken, even though I grew up in a land where class is a dead word. But the privilege and entitlement money brings are a whole other thing here. I grew up in a relentlessly downwardly mobile family cursed by alcohol and drugs and the kind of poverty that brings, of money, yes, but also of soul and hope and expansive view. I got to university on my own steam, in my thirties, but still struggle with the feelings of not fitting in and imposter issues you describe. So here’s to the misfits and outsiders. Our stories have as much literary currency as any others and we must tell them as honestly and proudly as we can.
"It's about honoring your own experience and background..." Thanks for this post. I've been blogging as Rust Belt Girl for 7 years now, trying to do just that. In American parlance, I say: screw the haters. And not to add insult to injury, but of course we Americans tend to view all Englishmen as basically Hugh Grant-posh. Or if we make any distinction it's a blanket stereotype: tough northerners, soft southerners. Well done owning your experiences and drawing on them in your creative work; would that readers come to the work open-minded and -hearted.
Love this! My sister and I were the first ones in our family to go to university. My family was initially stunned when I took to school work so well and speculated that the concussion I had when I was three “knocked sense into” me.
Thanks so much Angela. And that’s a funny little anecdote. I’m sure it was more than a concussion that got you to university, but families do like to keep us grounded, don’t they?
Well said Ken ... your words have made me reflect on the struggle my parents must have had to be the only offspring of their families to 'aspire' to leave their council house/working class upbringing behind. Self employment for our Dad as a cleaner, with five kids to raise and a mortgage was tough, especially as he never fulfilled his dream to study, and spent a lifetime (whenever he wasn't working,), with his nose in a book. Like you, my brother and I were the first generation to go to university, but I still feel confused about where I 'fit in'.
Thanks Bee. Yes, my dad had talent and brains, but no opportunities really to use it. Both parents left school at 14 or 15, but thankfully both were readers and understood the importance of books.
Fitting in, eh, a lifetime’s work it seems to me...
I can relate to this completely. I grew up poor. My parents were desperate for me to have an 'education' and to get out. Especially my dad. My accent therefore is nothing like his common cockney. It;s proper Queens English. I acquired it as a child. It's painful. That past we try to leave behind yet can't quite forget. It made us who we became.
Exactly this, I’ve been writing a book which is about memory and the way we have to come to terms with it in order to create a vision of the future - same part of the brain apparently. And yes, the past may be painful but it also is a bright pool to dip into for our writing, that’s the best way I can see it as a positive.
Great article, Ken. I hate that people question you and that they question the need to rebalance the scales, that they feel their own privilege is threatened by this. Also, to say - fellow bassoon player here (for similar reasons!)
Thanks Matt. I think some people are of the opinion that it’s ‘making a fuss about nothing’ to talk about working class roots and what it can or should mean. But it’s a topic worth discussing - especially when it comes to the choice of how to, or not, incorporate it in your work.
And great to know you are a fellow bassoonist! That’s so cool. I wonder if there are enough bassoonist writers out there to form a band?
Great post Ken. If only the judging and justifying could stop, we'd all have more energy for the things that matter. Here's for all the open-hearted people out there ❤️
Thanks Cole. I don’t mind an open discussion and if that person had approached me at the event, we could have talked and found common ground or at least some healthy debate. But alas, this was not the way they went. It’s difficult - for me at least - to express ‘rawthenticity’ without feeling like I am ‘making a fuss’, but I guess sometimes you have to put stuff out there.
Love this, Ken, even though I grew up in a land where class is a dead word. But the privilege and entitlement money brings are a whole other thing here. I grew up in a relentlessly downwardly mobile family cursed by alcohol and drugs and the kind of poverty that brings, of money, yes, but also of soul and hope and expansive view. I got to university on my own steam, in my thirties, but still struggle with the feelings of not fitting in and imposter issues you describe. So here’s to the misfits and outsiders. Our stories have as much literary currency as any others and we must tell them as honestly and proudly as we can.
Thanks for sharing Anna, I understand the struggle and agree totally that our stories are our own, have merit, and deserve to be heard.
"It's about honoring your own experience and background..." Thanks for this post. I've been blogging as Rust Belt Girl for 7 years now, trying to do just that. In American parlance, I say: screw the haters. And not to add insult to injury, but of course we Americans tend to view all Englishmen as basically Hugh Grant-posh. Or if we make any distinction it's a blanket stereotype: tough northerners, soft southerners. Well done owning your experiences and drawing on them in your creative work; would that readers come to the work open-minded and -hearted.
Thanks for your comment Rebecca, I fully intend to screw the haters!
And the fact that you have sustained a blog over seven years honouring your own experience is a fantastic feat in itself.
We all, I think, have stereotypes about different countries - living in Europe you have plenty of neighbours to do that with!
And thank you for your encouragement, it’s appreciated.
Love this! My sister and I were the first ones in our family to go to university. My family was initially stunned when I took to school work so well and speculated that the concussion I had when I was three “knocked sense into” me.
Thanks so much Angela. And that’s a funny little anecdote. I’m sure it was more than a concussion that got you to university, but families do like to keep us grounded, don’t they?
Well said Ken ... your words have made me reflect on the struggle my parents must have had to be the only offspring of their families to 'aspire' to leave their council house/working class upbringing behind. Self employment for our Dad as a cleaner, with five kids to raise and a mortgage was tough, especially as he never fulfilled his dream to study, and spent a lifetime (whenever he wasn't working,), with his nose in a book. Like you, my brother and I were the first generation to go to university, but I still feel confused about where I 'fit in'.
Thanks Bee. Yes, my dad had talent and brains, but no opportunities really to use it. Both parents left school at 14 or 15, but thankfully both were readers and understood the importance of books.
Fitting in, eh, a lifetime’s work it seems to me...
I feel this. <3
Thanks Sean, keep on keeping on!
I can relate to this completely. I grew up poor. My parents were desperate for me to have an 'education' and to get out. Especially my dad. My accent therefore is nothing like his common cockney. It;s proper Queens English. I acquired it as a child. It's painful. That past we try to leave behind yet can't quite forget. It made us who we became.
Exactly this, I’ve been writing a book which is about memory and the way we have to come to terms with it in order to create a vision of the future - same part of the brain apparently. And yes, the past may be painful but it also is a bright pool to dip into for our writing, that’s the best way I can see it as a positive.
Terrific post, Ken. I can relate to this so much.
Thanks Kathy, I was glad to be able to use your quote about honouring and owning your own story, it is important stuff.
Great article, Ken. I hate that people question you and that they question the need to rebalance the scales, that they feel their own privilege is threatened by this. Also, to say - fellow bassoon player here (for similar reasons!)
Thanks Matt. I think some people are of the opinion that it’s ‘making a fuss about nothing’ to talk about working class roots and what it can or should mean. But it’s a topic worth discussing - especially when it comes to the choice of how to, or not, incorporate it in your work.
And great to know you are a fellow bassoonist! That’s so cool. I wonder if there are enough bassoonist writers out there to form a band?